Now what...

P has been interesting. When I tried to teach him to read (when he was four) I assumed that his lack of attention was because he wasn't ready and we moved on to other things.

Luckily, he has a kindergarten teacher who is less willing to give up.

Okay, not at first. He initially tested into first grade math. The first few weeks his teacher wanted to move him back, we chatted and she left him in the class and now he loves it. With P it takes some extra persistence but he does his work. Over Thanksgiving break he requested to finish his homework early and then found other math to do on his own.  He is moving incredibly quickly and I'm just here for the ride!

We did also have S, M & D tested by a child neuropsychologist.

S, just as I thought would happen, tested perfectly average. She's just fine, though does have a bit more anxiety than normal. I wanted her to go mainly because there is a family history of mental illness (her bio-mom and bio-grandma). The problems tend to occur in her bio-family line during teenager years, and I want her to be comfortable seeing a psychologist if the need ever arises. 

D was diagnosed with neurological development disorder, ADHD. His IQ is very low average.

M was also diagnosed with neurological development disorder, ADHD (mostly due in inattention), and borderline mental functioning. His IQ is extremely low/borderline mentally disabled.

S, M & D were all exposed to alcohol and teratogens while in utero; exposure to such substances can have a rather varied impact.

The neuropsychologist referred us to genetic testing for M & D, because of their scores and a few other physical traits which she pointed out. According to her as time moves on M & D's ability to function will be outpaced by their peers; the gap between their understanding and where they should be will widen. (Probably why D is low- but still average IQ, and M is borderline functioning.)

These reports are meant to be a protection for M & D. If they get into trouble(law)-I hope that these reports will show that they need help. Extra support from people around them to function. Just as a blind person may need a sight-seeing dog(or as my friend calls them- an object avoidance dog), or a hearing disabled person needs a hearing aid. My boys need to be surrounded by good people who will not take advantage of them. They, in a way, need someone to be the other half of their brain. (They will most likely forever function as children even if their bodies grow to be adults.)

So while at home, M & D practice life function skills. They learn to cook, pick balanced meals, make their beds, pick up after themselves, we practice hygiene, etc. Because, it just takes them longer to remember how to do it.  Also, I refuse to hold them back. I will forever push them to learn, just with the understanding that it will take longer.